keep going

I spent another fun day with my girlies and some friends. I am now getting ready for an early bedtime so I can get up nice and early and run 3.5 miles. I am not overly enthusiastic about the run, just about how good I will feel when it is over:) I finally saw the scale budge - just a little, mind you - but that makes me happy that all this running is finally starting to have some effect on my body shape and weight. I need to keep at it though to see some real progress in the next few months. I want to be a stronger and slightly faster runner and be able to run the 4 miler and a 10 K this fall. And someday before I turn 40 years old, I'd like to try to run the Cville 10 Miler. So, I have to keep going....

wonderful summer day

Another wonderful lazy summer day with my girlies. We had a playdate with some friends - their mom had to work part of the day so we got to play as a result. The girlies loved having O and J over. J had a blast playing Wii sports. And after making an assortment of interesting crafty things for the American Girl dolls, the 3 girls moved on to creating a spa/gym for the dolls. They set up a treadmill and other exercise equipment and had the dolls decked out in workout gear. Too cute. I was secretly hoping someone would give me a pedicure while they were at it:)

After our friends left, my girlies asked to paint. I got out the acrylics and canvas and they created some great paintings. I can't wait to hang them up in their room. S asked for more canvas so maybe we'll have to make a run down to Michael's in the next few days. I always dread getting all the supplies out, occupying my dining room table for most of a day and then the clean-up, BUT I always enjoy seeing what their imaginations can come up with. Maybe I'll paint something with them next time too. I have always wanted to do some of those super close up flower paintings where just a petal takes up the whole paper, or the back of a leaf and stem. I want to try photography at this level too. My husband just bought another lens for his camera that should allow me to experiment with flower macro photography very soon. Maybe if I have any sort of eye for it, I'll learn how to post my own photos on here too.

employment roller coaster

So I had just gotten used to the idea that I have no job for the upcoming school year. I interviewed 5 different times for 4 different positions and was not called for any of them. At first I was a little disappointed. Then I was content, knowing that whatever happens will be for the best. Even if I can't see the big picture right now, I know God has plans for me. Maybe this will free me up to do more through my church or maybe the right job is yet to come along. I am constantly at odds within myself over whether or not I want to go back to teaching at all. I feel like I should try it out now, while my teaching license is still valid and I haven't forgotten everything I once knew. Since I haven't been successful in my interviews, maybe they know something that I don't know. Maybe they know that my own children are more important to me than other people's children. Maybe they know that I haven't worked in a school setting in over 8 years so things are very different as far as paperwork, requirements, and assessments. Maybe they know that I would rather be teaching preschool than middle school. Maybe they know I would rather be available to go on every field trip and help a friend with childcare than be at a 7-4 job and then still have hours of planning to do in the evening when I should be helping my own children and making dinner and being that mom and wife I want to be.

I say all this in a stream of consciousness kind of ranting, but then I remember that just a few hours ago I got another phone call for yet another teaching job interview for Monday. So, on Monday I will put on my only outfit fit for a professional setting and go into the school with a smile and tell all I know about reading interventions. This is a part time position in a neighboring county so school holidays and snow days could be different. Something to think about. But like the other 5 interviews, I am not even thinking about what to do if I do get it. I refuse to clutter up my brain with what ifs. I need to remain calm, interview the best I can, and then wait patiently until I find out what the next step will be. This employment roller coaster is wearing me out. Only a month to go before school starts so this might all shake out by then...I hope!

2.5 mile run

I think I am finally recovered from a visit from my sister and her three children. They stayed with us for 5 days and we had a great time. My girlies were so excited to play with the cousins! I noticed how incredibly quiet it was here today without all five of them running around and talking (sometimes shouting and screaming, yikes!). It was nice to get a visit in and catch up. We will be traveling up to visit my sister and the rest of my family in another 2 weeks after we visit my husband's brother and family. They are expecting a baby any day now. My sister-in-law is actually overdue now and I am sure she is anxiously awaiting the little baby boy. My girlies can't wait to meet their new cousin too!

I ran this evening with some friends and did okay considering the heat/humidity tonight. It has been so mild so far this summer that I don't think that I am really prepared for it - and it is already the end of July! I ran 2.5 miles in 28:58. I think that isn't too bad? The first 2 miles were fine, and then I thought I knew where we were stopping and it turns out that where I thought our run would end was only 2 miles instead of 2.5. So, needless to say, my brain was unhappy that I still had .5 miles to go when I thought I was finished. Does that make sense? So with my head not happy, my calves promptly joined the disappointment and so I ran the last .5 mile through a field and then another lap around the track fairly slow. I was at 20:46 at the end of the 2 mile mark. So I guess that 8 minutes for a half mile wasn't too good after all:(

O well, I'll run again on Thursday and just keep plugging away at it. I know I'll be able to run the 4 miler, without walking at all. But, I am still a little concerned that I will not break 42:00 minutes. But I have a T-shirt that say "Whether you think you can or think you can't, you are probably right" So I am going to chose to think I can. I will be under 42 minutes!

md club book #4

The mother-daughter book club is going very well. M and I chose Philippa Fisher's Fairy Godsister as the first book in our newly formed club back in April. Then came Island of the Blue Dolphins in May. Then Because of Winn Dixie for June. And so this past Sunday was devoted to choice #4 - The Daring Book for Girls by Andrea Buchanon and Miriam Peskowitz. This book was not a novel like the others so it was kind of exciting to be able to skim through this volume and pick and choose what was interesting to us. M read it during her "Quiet Time" during the day. (M is much too old for a nap, but she still needs a bit of quiet time to read or draw or listen to her MP3 and iDog without interruption from me or her younger sister). When she said she was through with it, I opened it up and looked through it as well. What a great collection of memories for me. Making daisy chains, friendship bracelets, 14 ways to play tag, how to tell a ghost story, yoga moves and jump rope songs. Wow, I want to go outside right now and try to do a cartwheel!

There is also a website and sequel out now called The Double Daring Book for Girls. I think this is a great book to have on hand if you ever invite your daughter's friends over for a playdate or sleepover. M decided to follow the directions in the prank section and make fake blood and smear it all over her arm and run screaming into the meeting that she broke her arm. All the girls looked at her and said, "Oh that must be the fake blood! Cool, Can I try it?" So, while she didn't really fool anyone, they all thought it was cool and wanted to make it too. The girls shared their favorite parts of this book and talked about what kind of adventure they would like to go on. Then the girls got to make their own friendship bracelets. It was a beautiful afternoon outside to spend with friends!

I am really enjoying this club and getting to know each mother and daughter better. Since I put this group of women and children together, they all knew me already. So it has been really neat watching the women interact and get friendly with each other as well. The girls all seem to like the meetings and have a great time together. There are 7 moms and 7 daughters altogether, representing 5 different schools, 3 different churches in 2 counties. I am hoping for a close bunch of friends that will help each girl feel secure in themselves and their friends whether they see each other every day at school, or every Sunday at church, or just once a month at book club. As the girls grow up, I hope this club will continue and grow in friendship and love.

#89 Year of Wonders

I finished this book a few days ago and just couldn't make myself sit down and write it up. We had a very busy weekend filled with a surprise party for friends, mother-daughter book club(I'll fill you in about that one in tomorrow's post), training runs for my race, church and teaching Sunday school, and the best part of my weekend - seeing the newest Harry Potter movie. I just love Harry Potter!!

So on to the book - Year of Wonders by Geraldine Brooks. I really enjoyed reading this book. Historical fiction is so interesting and it has taken over my reading preferences. Rarely do I read anything else these days. While I have read many biblical based fiction stories (stories about Esther and Sarah and Michel - David's wife) and fiction based on European painters (The Birth of Venus by Sarah Dunant was awesome and Girl with the Pearl Earring by Tracy Chevalier was really good too), I had never given much thought to the plague before or how it attacked the world as it did hundreds of years ago. I was very interested in the relationship between Anna, the main character who loses her family one by one, and the preacher and his wife. I am intrigued by the different religious thoughts at the time that God sent the plague to sinners to teach them a lesson or blaming the Devil and "witches" for bringing the contagion to their small community. It amazes me how whole families were wiped out, how one member of some households managed to avoid the plague, and how people deal with a crisis of this magnitude. The fact that this book was based on a real town in England that quarantined itself off to stop the spread the disease made it so much more interesting to imagine. How exhausting to be alive at this time, terrified of the disease, trying to help affected friends and family, dealing with the people who take advantage of the weak when they need help the most. No wonder some people went mad, how could you be expected to take all that on and not be completely destroyed in the process. Even in her weakness, Anna remains such a powerful character.


I was absorbed throughout the book and was only partially disappointed with the very ending of Anna's tale. I don't want to spoil anything for those of you who haven't' read it yet - because I do recommend it! I just want there to be a slightly different ending. If you finish reading this book and want me to elaborate of what I would have changed, send me a comment and I'll share some more...

Next up is 10 Year Nap by Meg Wolitzer. This one just spoke to me. Four friends who have been stay at home moms for 10 years and their thoughts and feelings and struggles with the choices they have made. Will they go back to work or continue as just mom? Since I am currently struggling with this issue myself I thought I might gain some wisdom by reading this book. I hope there is wisdom to be gleaned because I could sure use some:)

a run at the track

I got up extra early this morning to run at the track with a friend and train for the Women's 4 Miler race in September. I am not a morning person at all, so this in itself is a big deal for me. Never mind the fact that I got up early to run! We went to the track at the university, along with several hundred other women. Today was time trial day, where you run around the track for 4 laps and get a time of how fast you can run one mile. My friend and I skipped this part of the training since I already know that I am a fairly consistent runner with a 10:30 pace for one mile. I am hoping to improve on this time to be closer to a 10 minute mile pace so my race time will be closer to 42:00 (or a little less would even be better, but I am realistic:))

So opting for a run through the university, we ran from the track to the clock tower by the aquatic center and back, roughly a 2 mile trek on hilly roads. I ran this same course last week with a total time of 20:52 (10:14 1st mile/10:38 2nd mile) by myself in cooler weather. This morning I ran with a friend who is faster than me but claims she can't run as far, so we should even each other out. We ran it a little slower 21:17 (10:25 1st mile/10:52 2nd mile) but I did stop to walk for about 30 seconds on the way back. Sometimes I get going and start to breathe erratically which kinda freaks me out a little bit and then I start to hyperventilate. So I felt the extra heartbeats and then felt like I couldn't get enough air, so I tried to slow down and walk to keep from a full out attack. I know the initial signs are probably just telling me to slow down a little bit or stop talking so much. I know I think too much about it and I get myself all worked up; which, of course, makes it worse. So, it is mostly in my head. I am working on it.
This only happens when I am trying to run faster than usual or when it is hot outside, so I don't think it is life threatening - just inconvenient and annoying. My friend was great, she kept running, at a slower pace but stayed with me until I could start again and then I didn't need to stop again. She is a great running partner and an even better friend. Maybe I'll get over my weird medical/psychological issues some day, but it is even more likely I'll just add more to the list:)

book or movie - which is better?

The girlies and I had a movie night tonight. We subscribe to Netflix and this week's movie was Because of Winn Dixie. You may have noticed that last month's mother daughter book club book selection was Because of Winn Dixie by Kate DiCamillo. M and I were excited to finally watch this movie even though S was not convinced it was worth watching. She came around very quickly, maybe she really liked it - she giggled enough and snuggled when the thunderstorm came. Or maybe she just appreciated the fact that the movie was 1 hour and 46 minutes - which meant bedtime would be later than usual! It is hard to say with S, she is crafty:)

M mentioned after the movie was over that she doesn't like when the movie is different from the book - because you are expecting things to happen in a certain way and then they don't. I know what she means! There are so many books that have been excellent books but have not made very good movies. Like the DaVinci Code and Angels and Demons by Dan Brown and Harry Potter books 3 and 5 by JK Rowling. These are awesome, suspenseful, and intriguing books with great descriptive language and style and/or nonstop action. The movies pale in comparison because they just can't live up to the book. Because the movie would have to be 7 hours long to include everything of value. Because the actors that were cast don't really fit the character. Whatever the reason, sometimes you just can't equal the book.

I would much rather read a book than watch a movie anyway, but I do enjoy going to the movies too. I like romantic comedies and thrillers. I like snuggling up to my husband and smiling/giggling at the silly antics. I like trying to figure out where the plot is going and who is the bad/good guy. Because I go to the movie theater so infrequently these days - unless it is for a G rated animated kid flick - I have found out that I love action movies too. I like the big explosions and car chases. If I am going to pay $10 a ticket and see a movie larger than life in front of me then I want it to be a movie like Mission Impossible or Die Hard. Cars flying up a ramp and into a helicopter. Assassins hiding out and giving chase through a crowded city street. Spies sneaking around trying to outsmart each other and save the day.

Having said that, I am also a great big fan of romantic drama. One book and movie that I love love love - The Notebook. Different from each other in a few areas but still brilliantly done. I love a book or a movie that can make you cry - I know I have talked about this before. But rarely do you find a book and a movie that are both so wonderful. If you have any other suggestions of this kind of book and/or movie please send a comment....I'd love to put then on my reading/watching list!

happy birthday to me

Yesterday was my birthday. I love my birthday like some people love Christmas morning or a friend of mine loves July 4th. I count down the days usually from June 1 (45 days). This year I started even earlier when I found a countdown timer for my iGoogle page. My friends and family expect this of me and I would hate to disappoint them so I continue to hype it up every year. The past few years I have had grand images of what would happen on my birthday. Great parties or intimate dinners, long hikes with the family or a trip to the movie theater, beautiful jewelry or a CD I've been wanting. I have to admit sometimes I was a little disappointed on the actual day because it went so fast or we couldn't do what I wanted to do. One year, my husband fell asleep at 9:30. I am forever teasing him about this!

Anyway, to avoid the disappointment I decided this year not to make any plans. I helped a friend out by watching her daughter during the day and then she invited us to the pool in the afternoon! That was definitely a good birthday thing to do. Then I made exactly what I wanted for dinner and I even made my own cake. I am really picky about cakes so I knew that only I could make the one I really wanted. So even though no one took me out to dinner and no one brought me a cake and I had no presents to unwrap, this was the best birthday I have had in a long time. I spent it with my wonderful children - who can now swim without floaties! - and some good friends. My husband did the dishes after dinner and put the girlies to bed. No expectations, no disappointments. If only I could apply this to other areas of my life....

nap

I want a nap:)

Why is it that I want to nap and my kids don't?

Tomorrow is my birthday and I haven't even made my cake yet! I bet the girlies will help me in the morning. We'll make a bigger mess but it will be more fun to bake together.

dmv

I went to the DMV this morning to get a new driver's license. My old one expires this month and it has been 5 years since I have gone through this. I am happy to exchange my old license for a new one with a picture that actually looks like me. I got a really bad haircut last time and had no choice but to immortalize it on my driver's license. So, even though I won't see the new one until they mail it to me in the next 2 weeks, I am ecstatic to be replacing the old one. It just has to be better then that awful pixie hair cut.

A friend of mine so graciously offered to watch my girlies while I went to the DMV. I waited for just over an hour for my turn so I am very glad that I didn't have to entertain my kids while waiting in that room full of bad moods. Several people around me were complaining on how long it takes to get to the counter. Some others were complaining about the act of coming to the DMV in general. A man near me was saying it was just a waste of time and money, money that the state is just extorting from everyone. I tried to focus on my book. I thought ahead and brought a book (A Year of Wonders) with me so I didn't have to make small talk - and angry small talk at that. I agree that my trip to the DMV wasn't on my list of top ten things to do today, but it needs to be done. I don't understand the need to complain about it. It is a fact of life at this point and being bitter over it just makes the experience even worse while you are there.

Also, yesterday was my 12th wedding anniversary. I love you Chris! Thanks for a great day, both today and 12 years ago and every day in between:)

#90 Sarah's Key

Oh my! I can honestly say that I loved this book. Sarah's Key by Tatiana De Rosnay is one of the best books I have read in a long time. I haven't been that horrified or angry while reading a book in a very, very long time. And I consider that a good sign. My eyes teared up a few times as well. If you can be moved to tears, to sorrow, to laugh out loud, to really feel the emotions and connect with a character. Why else would you write? What more could you want from your audience?

The book moves back and forth between Paris, 1942 and Paris, 2002. It tells a story of a Jewish girl and her family rounded up by the French police to be sent to Auschwitz to their deaths. It was such a terrible time for the world and I cannot even begin to imagine what that must have been like for the Jewish families and for any other person alive at that time living with the fear and hatred that covered Europe. In the beginning when the book was still flip-flopping between then and now I closed the cover several times to tell my husband about how horrible the events were. Could you imagine if that happened today? I couldn't fall asleep without thinking about what I had just read. I didn't want to stop reading. Would Sarah escape? Would her brother be safe?

The "now" part of the story tells a tale of an American journalist and her family and French in-laws. She finds out that her in-laws are linked to Sarah's story. Not to mention she has her own imploding marriage and a baby on the way. I really enjoyed reading this book. I loved the historical part of this work of fiction. I like being brought to another time and place and feeling the emotions and understanding the choices people make based on what they know at the time.

So, without going on and on and spoiling it for y'all. I definitely recommend this one. Next up: Year of Wonders by Geraldine Brooks.

party crashing

I had a great time last night crashing a party in another neighborhood. We were invited even though it is mainly a neighborhood party. The girlies and I decorated cupcakes with flags on top and went on our way to this place where I would love to live. It is one of those neighborhoods where it seems everyone knows and likes everyone else. The kids all play outside all day in the street. Where the parents hang out in some one's backyard every summer night and just enjoy each other's company. There was a pool for the girlies to swim in. There was picnic food galore and many friends to catch up with and new families to meet. The fireworks were amazing! Certainly putting many displays I have seen to shame.

There are 2 houses for sale on this road right now and we have been to look inside both of them. Neither is ideal, but one could be the house with some improvements. I know I need a job before we could go and make an offer. I am trying but have not been successful yet. Something will come up, I know but I am growing impatient and a little jealous of this neighborhood that I want to be a part of. I don't usually have jealousy about things that other people have - not about cars, clothes, jewelry, relationships with husbands or children. But I do get house envy quite easily. Not that my house isn't a blessing. I like my little house but it is little and we need a little more space. And if we are going to move somewhere I want it to be where I already have friends for me and my children. I want it to be where the schools are good and the church is close by. I want it be where I could envision myself for the rest of my life. My current neighborhood has twisty, hilly, narrow roads where people drive too fast. I would never let my girlies ride their bikes up there in the road! O well, guess I need to get a job before I can get out of my neighborhood. So I will try to be thankful for the little house I have, the beautiful lake in the backyard, the health and happiness of my family and not focus on what I want. I just told S this morning that the porch swing at Lowes was a want and not a need. I guess I should remind myself also that the yellow house is a want and not a need.

4th of July 5K

I ran a 5K this morning. I didn't feel so great when I first woke up this morning. Too much junk food yesterday - we had dinner at Friendly's so of course I had to have a peanut butter cup sundae. I felt like it was still there taunting me when I woke up, but I put on my big girl panties and went to the race anyway. My husband and my girlies were there to cheer for me. M and S made signs that said Go Mommy! They are so sweet!

I have always thought that I am slow, but consistently so. And I was reminded of that today as I went the through the first mile at 10:30 and then the second mile at 21:02. Hello - I have always run 10:30 miles and seems like I always will. How do I get faster? My husband has plans for that - but I have never been very motivated to follow his instructions. Anyway, back to the race. Just past the mile 2 mark there was a sharp uphill that I managed to run up but when I got tot he top and it leveled back out...I just couldn't breathe. So I stopped running and walked at a pretty quick pace just to get my breathing back under control. I have a tendency to hyperventilate if I get too overheated and/or anxious (I'm sure it is in my head more than anything, but that is just how I am). So I walked for about 30 seconds and then ran some more. I ran for another 2 minutes and then walked for another 30 seconds and then saw my husband and girlies again. I felt bad that I was walking when they spied me. I wanted my girlies to see me running, being a good strong healthy role model. So I sucked it up and started running again and was able to run all the way to the finish line another .5 mile away. I thought I would have to stop and walk a third time, but for some reason I felt good and just kept going. I picked it up at the very end to sprint past 2 or 3 people in the home stretch and finished with an official time of 33:54. That puts my last 1.1 miles at 12:52. So considerably slower than the first 2 miles, but with the walking, I'm not surprised by that. Plus, this was my first 3 miles outside (I'm usually a treadmill runner) since last summer so I feel good about it anyway. Yay me!

all stars

I spent the day on a small road trip to Stafford, Virginia with my family. We left about 8:45 this morning and drove the 90 minutes to watch an all star baseball game. Some friends of ours have an 8 year old boy on the team. My husband, the photographer, went to support A and take photos. Hopefully some of the families will look up the photos on his website and buy a few, but mostly we went to support A. The first game was fun to watch, 16-1 in favor of our team. The second game was even better to watch, and bite your fingernails, and as M says "feel that tingly feeling in my belly" of nervous happiness. This game we lost (I know, I had nothing to do with it, but I mean the team I went there to watch:) 7-6 after a few tied innings and great plays by both sides. It is a double elimination tournament so they play again tomorrow morning, I hope they rally and get to continue. It was fun to watch and I remembered how much I used to like watching baseball back in my college days. My girls were really well behaved and interested in the games. I taught M a little bit about what was going on out on the field. S found a friend from school whose big brother was on the team so she had a blast with her unexpected playdate. I was great weather for spending the day outside too! Go Greene All-Stars!!!!

#91 Crow Lake

I finished Crow Lake today. And let me tell you, I am in a slump. So I am shaking it up a bit and reading something I found at the library yesterday. I saw a book at Target with an intriguing title and cover art - it caught my eye. And then the back cover synopsis had me wondering about the story for days afterwards. So I requested it from the library even though I said I wouldn't do that until my 99 books were read and gone. But I have been reading some really uninteresting books lately that I thought I would try something that actually sounds interesting to me for a change. So, hopefully, the next book will be better.

So here goes with Crow Lake. It was easy to read but not the least bit interesting. Pond life, academia in Canada, farm life, parents dying early in the main characters life (I think we have covered this already a few times!), and relationship troubles between family members. I cannot even make it sound interesting here. So I will stop trying. I don't recommend this one...

On a lighter note, 14 days till my birthday:)